It's not what you are eating, it's what's eating you…

Posts tagged ‘#covid19’

#SuicidePrevention help for those who are frontline workers in the era of #COVID19 who know how to save others lives BUT not their own….

http://www.befrienders.org
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org

Emotional Wellbeing During the COVID-19 Outbreak

inspirational quotes suicidal person Best of lost black and white depressed depression sad suicidal suicide

Important Disclaimers: I am NOT a clinically trained medical or mental health professional, nor do I have any training in public safety.

I will always advise those in crisis seek immediate professional assistance from emergency services, going to the closest acute care facility or contacting above links for help.

The BUT though of why people especially physicians, nurses and first responders who know the resources but for reasons that I’ll address in blog, when in crisis themselves, would be the last people on the planet to actually contact them.

So, while the resources posted above are either for those who don’t know about the resources and are in need of them or  really are in hopes for those people who know crisis resources due to profession to have a change of heart or mind, but if they aren’t able to, to talk more about their suicidal ideation by seeking other avenues of support that hopefully can help with bring some calm, comfort and clarity, which is so hard to come by, when one is in actual crisis.

But if one is not able to, something I understand, as someone who’s struggled with suicidal ideation knows all the resources, knows and has saved other people’s lives but has struggled when it’s come to saving my own life, hopefully this will help.

I don’t though want to trigger anyone, if topic matter is not able to provide constructive help, hope and healing, I beg of you to find something that will help you find the support you need to get through the crisis you are dealing with.

***

IF a picture is worth a thousand words, the above picture quote in this blog is worth about 10 million.

I’m not digressing by saying that, it just says as concisely and correctly as possible, how people who are struggling with suicidal thoughts.

The target population of this blog, is physicians, other frontline workers, first responders who are at risk of suicide, not that I don’t hope that what I say could help anyone who may be in need, and while I’ve addressed multiple times for suicide prevention/awareness in society, I’ve only addressed this in physician populations only once before prior to the COVID-19 era.

As a non clinical professional who still in a roundabout way treats patients (bariatric surgical complication patients) but more of a last responder than a first one, having medical and mental health crisis due to my own bariatric complications that were unpleasant, unprecedented, life threatening and unpredictable even after they were no longer life threatening, for years that have left me for almost 1/3rd of my life now, to live a life with a new normal, I know but only a tiny bit but so well the struggle and the suffering.

Just like most medical professionals, frontline workers and first responders didn’t need COVID-19 to know the fragility and complexity of disease to humans, it’s just that now we are all are confronted by so much more unprecedented unpredictable crisis beyond what even the most stable of psyches couldn’t still possibly comprehend and process constructively, especially in a global state of crisis.

The thing first and foremost is the realization, you didn’t sign up for this, while none of us did, those who spent years in medical school or some formal medical, mental health or first responder training there was really no way to fully psychologically prepare any one regardless of specialty to the challenges and crisis professionally you’re all facing, let alone the personal ones.

If one has taken the Hippocratic Oath, that was to vow to not do intentional harm, it wasn’t to say that as much of a calling wanting to save others lives is, that it is to be at your own peril and the ones you love, all day, everyday with not just a lack of essential tools but no back up support in sight with all the unknowns that we still have with the pandemic.

The point I’m trying to make, is if the reason why you’re reading this, finding that you’re psychologically drowning in the abundance of others medical and psychological suffering, as well as your own, I’m not going to tell you that you don’t have a right to feel the way you feel.

Because you absolutely have every right to feel overwhelmed, overworked and unsupported and the devastation that comes with that  with no end that’s close in sight with the pandemic.

I’m also not going to throw out all the reasons why it’s wrong for you to be suicidal, that doesn’t help.

As well intentioned as hokey quotes like “put your hand over your heart and feel your heartbeat, that’s purpose and your life matters’ or harsher quotes that claim “suicide ends your suffering and just transfers it to another”, that isn’t going to help either, it’s  just going to make you feel worse.

What I am going though to now ask of you, is where you are now, emotionally?

Thinking about suicide, as a possible path out of your suffering?

Actually having a plan, with means and a date and your reasons regardless if you’ve wrote them out or not?

Now, I am going to ask you that if you are acutely suicidal and are unwilling to seek out professional help, that if you cannot bear right now to see that suicide is not the only path that’s left for you yet, to at least think about postponing it, where you are willing to try and understand better the trauma and grief that’s behind that current chosen path for you as a Plan A and maybe for the time being, make it a Plan B,C,D,E or never, but you may not be ready not to have it as an option.

One thing that is not talked about in the complexity of suicidality, is that while grief and trauma play into it, there is that part where when some of us who’ve tried to die by suicide, there is sometimes a complex component that can contain a misplaced sense of thinking and finding comfort that our suffering would finally be over.

This is not the place but it bears mention, as I’m duty bound and ethically committed to doing right by people in crisis and I don’t want to hurt anyone who might be reading this blog, who’s lost a loved one due to suicide, where again you’re not the target audience for this blog and I do address that in other blogs of mine.

The hopes that I have for physicians, nurses, first responders who are suicidal is that they ideally will get the help they need from others.

But if there is an unwillingness to do that, to try and honor the grief one is experiencing and the trauma and hopefully it will spark the realization that your life right now being in jeopardy, is the priority and hopefully getting you to see that the tools you have to save others lives can be directed in saving your own life, if there is an unwillingness to get professional help.

There is more initiatives now that see the psychological toll but there has to be more plans in place to get more medical staff in the frontlines, not just because of concern that is justified with frontline staff getting COVID-19, as well as other medical health issues that don’t stop just because of the pandemic but because burnout and suicide in physicians and frontline, first responders was an issue prior to the pandemic.

Please know that if you’re a physician, frontline and/or first responder who’s despondent there is help and hope for you, the peace though you desperately need right now, can happen in small doses, as the trauma this has caused, isn’t close to being over either in society or in your psyche but progress can be made where despair isn’t all consuming, as I’m not going to lie and say that it’s a matter of mindset that’s causing your horrific suffering, or that how you feel is going to completely go away soon, as it may not. as it’s the trauma, grief and fear of helplessness and being so overwhelmed in such unprecedented circumstances that cause the despondency and working to overcome it where it isn’t a risk to your life, as far as suicide, will take time, trying a combination of therapies.

And again, I’m so sorry for all of you being so tested and for your sacrifice and suffering the trauma you’ve experienced and your grief.

I hope and pray  though you can find it within yourself your value as a human first, as well as a healer that deserves to take time you may need to work on your own healing before you can save more lives but if you never save another life but your own, I hope you can see the heroes that you are and have always been and always will be.

I can’t stress again, I hope you get outside professional help but if you can’t, I hope you give yourself the dedication and attention to saving your own life like you would with another.

Sending peace and love and hopes and prayers that those who need it will accept that from me and so many who are wanting to help, having some understanding of why you are where you are emotionally…

#SuicidePrevention help for those who are frontline workers in the era of #COVID19 who know how to save others lives BUT not their own….

http://www.befrienders.org
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org

Emotional Wellbeing During the COVID-19 Outbreak

inspirational quotes suicidal person Best of lost black and white depressed depression sad suicidal suicide

Important Disclaimers: I am NOT a clinically trained medical or mental health professional, nor do I have any training in public safety.

I will always advise those in crisis seek immediate professional assistance from emergency services, going to the closest acute care facility or contacting above links for help.

The BUT though of why people especially physicians, nurses and first responders who know the resources but for reasons that I’ll address in blog, when in crisis themselves, would be the last people on the planet to actually contact them.

So, while the resources posted above are either for those who don’t know about the resources and are in need of them or  really are in hopes for those people who know crisis resources due to profession to have a change of heart or mind, but if they aren’t able to, to talk more about their suicidal ideation by seeking other avenues of support that hopefully can help with bring some calm, comfort and clarity, which is so hard to come by, when one is in actual crisis.

But if one is not able to, something I understand, as someone who’s struggled with suicidal ideation knows all the resources, knows and has saved other people’s lives but has struggled when it’s come to saving my own life, hopefully this will help.

I don’t though want to trigger anyone, if topic matter is not able to provide constructive help, hope and healing, I beg of you to find something that will help you find the support you need to get through the crisis you are dealing with.

***

IF a picture is worth a thousand words, the above picture quote in this blog is worth about 10 million.

I’m not digressing by saying that, it just says as concisely and correctly as possible, how people who are struggling with suicidal thoughts.

The target population of this blog, is physicians, other frontline workers, first responders who are at risk of suicide, not that I don’t hope that what I say could help anyone who may be in need, and while I’ve addressed multiple times for suicide prevention/awareness in society, I’ve only addressed this in physician populations only once before prior to the COVID-19 era.

As a non clinical professional who still in a roundabout way treats patients (bariatric surgical complication patients) but more of a last responder than a first one, having medical and mental health crisis due to my own bariatric complications that were unpleasant, unprecedented, life threatening and unpredictable even after they were no longer life threatening, for years that have left me for almost 1/3rd of my life now, to live a life with a new normal, I know but only a tiny bit but so well the struggle and the suffering.

Just like most medical professionals, frontline workers and first responders didn’t need COVID-19 to know the fragility and complexity of disease to humans, it’s just that now we are all are confronted by so much more unprecedented unpredictable crisis beyond what even the most stable of psyches couldn’t still possibly comprehend and process constructively, especially in a global state of crisis.

The thing first and foremost is the realization, you didn’t sign up for this, while none of us did, those who spent years in medical school or some formal medical, mental health or first responder training there was really no way to fully psychologically prepare any one regardless of specialty to the challenges and crisis professionally you’re all facing, let alone the personal ones.

If you took the Hippocratic Oath, that was to vow to not do intentional harm, it wasn’t to say that as much of a calling wanting to save others lives is, that it is to be at your own peril and the ones you love, all day, everyday with not just a lack of essential tools but no back up support in sight with all the unknowns that we still have with the pandemic.

The point I’m trying to make, is if the reason why you’re reading this, finding that you’re psychologically drowning in the abundance of others medical and psychological suffering, as well as your own, I’m not going to tell you that you don’t have a right to feel the way you feel.

Because you absolutely have every right to feel overwhelmed, overworked and unsupported and the devastation that comes with that  with no end that’s close in sight with the pandemic.

I’m also not going to throw out all the reasons why it’s wrong for you to be suicidal, that doesn’t help.

As well intentioned as hokey quotes like “put your hand over your heart and feel your heartbeat, that’s purpose and your life matters’ or harsher quotes that claim “suicide ends your suffering and just transfers it to another”, that ain’t probably going to help either, it’s  just going to make you feel worse.

What I am going though to now ask of you, is where you are now, emotionally?

Thinking about suicide, as a possible path out of your suffering? Actually having a plan, with means and a date and your reasons regardless if you’ve wrote them out or not?

Now I am going to ask you that if you are acutely suicidal and are unwilling to seek out professional help, that if you cannot bear right now to see that suicide is not the only path that’s left for you yet, to at least think about postponing it, where you are willing to try and understand better the trauma and grief that’s behind that current chosen path for you as a Plan A and maybe for the time being, make it a Plan B,C,D,E or never, but you may not be ready not to have it as an option.

One thing that is not talked about in the complexity of suicidality, is that while grief and trauma play into it, there is that part where when some of us who’ve tried to die by suicide, it was a misplaced sense of knowing and finding comfort that our suffering would finally be over.

This is not the place but it bears mention, as I’m duty bound and ethically committed to doing right by people in crisis and I don’t want to hurt anyone who might be reading this blog, who’s lost a loved one due to suicide, where again you’re not the target audience for this blog and I do address that in other blogs of mine.

The hopes that I have for physicians, nurses, first responders who are suicidal is that they ideally will get the help they need from others.

But if there is an unwillingness to do that, to try and honor the grief one is experiencing and the trauma and hopefully it will spark the realization that your life right now being in jeopardy, is the priority and hopefully getting you to see that the tools you have to save others lives can be directed in saving your own life, if there is an unwillingness to get professional help.

There is more initiatives now that see the psychological toll but there has to be more plans in place to get more medical staff in the frontlines, not just because of concern that is justified with frontline staff getting COVID-19, as well as other medical health issues that don’t stop just because of the pandemic but because burnout and suicide in physicians and frontline, first responders was an issue prior to the pandemic.

Please know that if you’re a physician, frontline and/or first responder who’s despondent there is help and hope for you, the peace though you desperately need right now, can happen in small doses, as the trauma this has caused, isn’t close to being over either in society or in your psyche but progress can be made where despair isn’t all consuming, as I’m not going to lie and say that it’s a matter of mindset that’s causing your horrific suffering, or that how you feel is going to completely go away soon, as it may not. as it’s the trauma, grief and fear of helplessness and being so overwhelmed in such unprecedented circumstances that cause the despondency and working to overcome it where it isn’t a risk to your life, as far as suicide, will take time, trying a combination of therapies.

And again, I’m so sorry for all of you being so tested and for your sacrifice and suffering the trauma you’ve experienced and your grief.

I hope and pray  though you can find it within yourself your value as a human first, as well as a healer that deserves to take time you may need to work on your own healing before you can save more lives but if you never save another life but your own, I hope you can see the heroes that you are and have always been and always will be.

I can’t stress again, I hope you get outside professional help but if you can’t, I hope you give yourself the dedication and attention to saving your own life like you would with another.

Sending peace and love and hopes and prayers that those who need it will accept that from me and so many who are wanting to help, having some understanding of why you are where you are emotionally…

#ViolentCrimePrevention initiatives HAVE to be strengthened NOW #COVID19

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https://www.cnn.com/2020/04/06/europe/russia-shooting-lockdown-scli-intl/index.html

https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/akwpqe/shopper-upset-by-coronavirus-restrictions-runs-over-walmart-security-guard

http://www.befrienders.org

Emotional Wellbeing During the COVID-19 Outbreak

Important Disclaimers: I am NOT a clinically trained medical or mental health professional or in matters of public safety.

If you or anyone you know, poses a threat to oneself or others, please contact emergency services (again, half my readers aren’t in the U.S. and aren’t even in North America).

***

When I saw above linked articles, I was really sad.

What made me even more sad, was that I wasn’t surprised.

I’m not trying to come off like  I’m this uncredentialed, unrealized and unappreciated genius, cause I’m not.

I’m saying though as an activist/blogger who writes about medical, mental health and violent crime prevention awareness, that I’ve been worried that  it was possible people could/would weaponize the virus itself, a vehicle or actual weapons intending to wound, if not possibly cause fatal harm either online and/or offline, psychologically and/or medically consequentially, in and around homes, places of businesses and in acute care facilities, including, if not especially in and/or around a  hospital.

And I’m also saying that it’s very possible that violent actions are going to still escalate and while I cannot be the person, nor do I think only one person can help solve this, we all must try as hard to be  vigilantly working  on our mental health, tenacity, level of patience and preparedness, as we move through this unprecedented crisis.

As tragic as so many people dying from COVID-19 due to the actuality of the virus, deaths are just as tragic because of it.

The unprecedented #mentalhealth crisis that #COVID19 presents now and will continue to provide after it’s contained…

http://www.befrienders.org

The next pandemic will be in mental health


https://www.cnn.com/2020/04/04/politics/what-matters-april-3/index.html

Emotional Wellbeing During the COVID-19 Outbreak

Important Disclaimers: I am not a medical or mental clinically trained professional, if someone is in danger of hurting themselves and/or others, please contact emergency services, immediately.

Okay, back up to a few days before Valentine’s Day 2020.

My boyfriend comes home from work where he works for a global shipping company, and asks me “Guess what we’re getting slammed with in packages???”…

I reply back “Guns”.

He’s like “how did you know???”…

Because by then, that Wuhan based physician who tried to warn us about the virus had already passed away.

Because while I’m  not a clinically trained medical or mental health professional nor do I have any form of education in public safety, that in an uncertain time, that has become even more uncertain and scary to so many in the last 6 weeks , a gun would give stable people, possibly a feeling of some control, in a constructive way to protect their people and their possessions.

It would give those who were less stable, a tool to feel more in control in what was looking to possibly be to them, more uncertainty than they could bear.

You see now those who are reporting the news are in the news because of COVID-19.

We’ve seen famous, wealthy, noteworthy  and/or health people succumb to the damage the virus causes, as well as the first responders and frontline health workers become infected, some passing away, but everyday fighting to save other people’s lives, in circumstances most of us could’ve NEVER seen coming unless one is Bill Gates or was the genius that was Dr. Stephen Hawking.

We’ve seen people licking toilets or coughing in public saying they have COVID-19 whether they do or not.

We’ve seen people who know they have COVID-19 or suspect it and  not warn others, not social distance for what would be reasonable reason normally, such as having a loved one in the hospital and wanting to be there for them or unreasonable and unconscionable reasons to spread the virus.

Law Enforcement has seen an increase in domestic violence calls.

You have people who can’t seek acute care either without risk or even in epicenter like NYC now (and for some time) patients dying in unprecedented circumstances and their loved ones and medical professionals responses and their own suffering and knowing that here in the U.S., the feeling of being in crisis will have it’s effect on people.

I’ve been very blessed that everyone I love the most so far, is okay.

And today was supposed to be for my own mental health, a day where I took a break from watching the news but even the little I’m online or offline, as I got out today which is rare but was needed as I had prescriptions and food to get, there’s a reminder everywhere of the challenges COVID-19 has presented.

As others have said, we can’t just look for the helpers, like Mr. Rogers was famous for comforting us, we have to be the helpers, if we can.

And if one can’t help, at least be careful as they are capable of, to not to do any further harm to one another.

I can’t stress how important though it can help, that if you can just positively help someone is that you do so when you can.

Sometimes doing that is just reminding one another that we care and you see many initiatives online and off, that is doing this.

Sometimes, though it’s more sad and scary, but necessary to say at times, that people have to be just as vigilant about their mental fitness and agility, as some are with their physical health and fitness and realize some aren’t in control of either and/or the risks they present to others and be prepared for that and the unexpected in people and in patients that may have been physically and mentally fit in the past.

As sometimes medical crisis can cause mental health ones and I would know about that, almost better than anyone, unfortunately.

As much as we can try to convey and we can’t stop, that we’re in this together, there are so many factors here that will provide mental health challenges and crisis, that while may not rival  the medical crisis we’re in, that we still have to personally and as a community, professional or not, have to actively and constructively prepare for, both in ourselves and with others and we’re going to have to do this in a manner that’s  consistently, comprehensively and with patience and vigilance going forward as we all adjust and evolve because of the devastation and challenge that COVID-19 has now presented to everyone globally.

Kindness and patience with ourselves and with one another, while has always been important, is going to be of utmost importance, now, as we try hard to move forward.

#mentalhealth #covid19

http://www.befrienders.org

The next pandemic will be in mental health

Emotional Wellbeing During the COVID-19 Outbreak

While I didn’t think I was the only one worrying what is said on this blog that I’m linking, I have been wracking my brain for the last 3 days, feeling an urgent need to see something like this or a need to write something similar and then gratefully the blog linked up above, that came in Kevin M.D email tonight.

I’m so grateful that my non clinically trained cognitively disabled self didn’t have to address this, as while I’m good at providing comfort, I suck at being calm or concise.

I am so grateful for Dr. Hamdani for writing this wonderfully insightful and helpful blog.

And you will be grateful too, if you choose to read it, whether topic is and/or was on your mind.

Even if it wasn’t…

Peace…

Shhhh, #essentialworkers need their sleep!!!

 

Do-Not-Disturb-Sign-TRE-13565_1000

I get that for a multitude of reasons, people need to get outside or in their homes let off some steam.

Just please keep in mind that different neighbors may be taking a 5 p.m nap on a Thursday or a 10 a.m one on a Sunday,  because they work in a job that isn’t set to a traditional schedule in time or day of the week.

Please realize that most people do not want to hear loud nuisance noise for extended period of times and try to do better.

If one is feloniously stupid and/or thoughtless enough to think they should be able to do what they want, when they want like all the time,  when they live in any kind of community, well I’ll still wish you well.

As well as hope that they’ll come to realize one day that they don’t want to want to be without common consideration, any longer, either.

Peace… like literally!!!

griefyard…

quotescover-JPG-34

http://www.befrienders.org

Emotional Wellbeing During the COVID-19 Outbreak

This blog is with the intent to provide some kind of showing of care, concern and comfort for those who are suffering or feeling some level of grief stricken in time of global loss of life and sudden major change of life circumstances that are filled with uncertainty.

I’ve found while above song that I’m linking is perfect as it is, in the chorus “bring them all back to life”, I’ve added in my head “please don’t let them die” and “please let them all stay alive”, help me identify the sense of empathy I have for those who are suffering, and a desire to show caring, even though there’s so next to nothing I can do, other than that and identify how demoralizing it can feel so powerless.

As well give safe space  for  humans to help stay united, in our joined humanity and caring for others, that just putting out there that others have concern and compassion, can hopefully help someone who needs gentle reminding in time of suffering, that others care enormously about them and their loved ones and their losses.

Anyways I’m so sorry for those who are suffering for so many different reasons and I’m so  terribly sorry for your loss.

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