It's not what you are eating, it's what's eating you…

Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

UNFORGIVABLE FOOD FAUX PAS!!!

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Disclaimers: There IS a medical foundation in this blog, so it bears mentioning that if one is in crisis medically, PLEASE contact 911 or emergency services in your area.

***

I don’t like surprises, like of ANY kind.

In my top 3 though, of surprises that I HATE, has to do with food.

So I’m reading my local news today and catch actually, an older article on a local couple who were suing their wedding vendors, because they wanted to surprise their guests with an all vegan meal but not reveal that it was vegan, until the end of the reception, last Spring.

Apparently not only did it taste terrible and not well made but some of the workers at the wedding, did actually admit prior to the meal being over, that the wedding was vegan mandated in accordance to the wishes of the bride.

I will defend until the day I  DIE, people having any kind of food beliefs for any reason.

FOR THEMSELVES!!!

One may want to eat a certain way for religious, spiritual, health and/or any other reason and one is a somewhat rationally minded adult (I’m not  talking in regards to people who have Pica, etc and NOT talking about parents with their OWN children who don’t like feeding them sugar, GMOs etc).

And that’s great, as it’s your body, your business, your life.

DO NOT EVER though, “surprise” anyone with one’s food philosophy, like NEVER EVER DO THAT!!!

And because where people have different types of adverse reactions to different foods, sometimes deadly allergies, and they don’t have a certain kind of dietary philosophy and trying to surprise someone with that, could end their life, if not cause unnecessary medical, physical and/or emotional distress.

It’s ironic as I was already going to write a blog of this nature, I was with a friend a couple of days ago and we were talking about our own wacky biological makeups.

She went into FULL anaphylactic shock, when eating a sample food, that had a small amount of an ingredient at a big box store, before she knew she was allergic to it.

While the pharmacy on site, gave her epinephrine, it DID NOT work, because she was on a beta blocker.

In my case, because I haven’t wanted to get tested and can’t get an epi-pen without it, I just ALWAYS carry around a full box of diphenhydramine (don’t ever do what I do, I’m a moron about not getting allergy tested, as well as taking 2 dozen of diphenhydramine which I tolerate okay but someone else could overdose) because sometimes different foods trigger a “glass shard” feeling in my throat.

And while I’ve been in full anaphylactic shock, due to a medication reaction, that was when I was  in labor with my youngest and I was in a hospital full of physicians when that happened and it STILL was terrifying.

It’s NEVER okay, for ANY reason to surprise people when it comes to ANYTHING they are ingesting and it could ACTUALLY be DEADLY, even if an epi-pen is available, if someone is on anti-arrhytmics, MAO inhibitors and/or beta blockers, as well as other medications in other therapy classes can render Epinephrine less effective.

As well if it’s not potentially deadly, it can be  illegal, such as people who make food items with marijuana or other substances, even if they don’t have intention to do harm.

But even if a food item or any ingredient in a food dish, isn’t deadly to a person, people have a right to know what they’re being served when it comes to ANY food someone is serving them, ALWAYS.

Note: I will only publish constructive feedback. And again, this is about serving unknown/undisclosed foods to people where one may NOT know their food allergies and/or just want to unduly influence someone’s way of eating because they feel they’re eating philosophy is superior to someone else’s.

I’m NOT  talking about parents who sneak in vegetables in their own kids smoothies, etc.  Thanks!!!

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What, if anything can be done to reduce domestic murder/suicides??? #StigmaKills

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http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org 1-800-273-8255
http://www.befrienders.org (outside the U.S.)

Important Disclaimers: I’m NOT a clinically trained medical or mental health professional. I will ALWAYS encourage people in crisis to seek immediate professional help or call emergency services if they or someone they know is capable of hurting themselves or others.

The epidemic we are facing now, is that sometimes people are just snapping and killing loved ones and then themselves, when a relationship ends.

Sometimes there is an issue where in cases of domestic violence, recently, where a spouse seeks an order of protection and whether or NOT it’s granted, it’s still not enough for someone to not only kill their signficant others but children and other family or friends who are in the household or the spare the abused spouse, to cause as much horrific physical and emotional trauma as possible.

And sometimes people are commiting these horrific tragedies with no previous criminal or mental health history.

We are in a new era, that people who are clinically trained medical and mental health professionals and law enforcement and we as a society have to come up with a better way of potentially forecasting these potentially tragedies and educating people on gettting evaluated and treated for their depression and rage issues so it’s not fatal to them or anyone else.

I’d ask though if this is too sensitive of a topic for people, please DO NOT read.

Thanks…
***

I just managed to catch a beyond tragic story on People.com, a few minutes ago.

An Alabama man, after his wife, a 3rd grade teacher filed for divorce, due to his opioid addiction issues, and 9 days after she filed for divorce he shot her and 1 of 3 triplets to death, 2 of the triplets were also shot are in ICU after being able to escape and their 13 year old escaped before the father was able to shoot them and setting his house with the 2 of the dead bodies in it, last weekend.

I’ve probably now wrote at least a dozen blogs on trying to bring awareness on how to prevent domestic murder/suicides.

Again, it bears repeating, I’m NOT a clinically trained professional nor do I have any training in law enforcement or criminal psychology.

But this is what I do know:

Domestic violence has been around for a long time and it’s getting deadlier for a partner to end a relationship than it ever has been.

And even in relationships that domestic violence wasn’t a factor, more people are innocently are being killed, when a relationship ends, than ever before.

Both legal and illegal opioids have been around for a long time but more people are dying due to overdoses and as innocent parties to opioid addiction and abuse because of a loved one’s opioid addiction.

In this instance, it wasn’t released of whether or not that man was legally able to have a firearm.

And in the nature of how he ambushed his family, he still had the rage and kerosene to set his house on fire.

I’m not saying that I don’t believe in some issues regarding gun control.

Because I definitely do.

It’s not that I don’t feel any different with regulating opiates.

As I definitely do about that, as well.

The thing is though, if we don’t find a way for people whether it’s starting when people are young to find a way to constructively work through anger and rage, when feeling rejection, even if we could eradicate both guns and drugs, people would still die from addiction issues and be murdered in a different manner other than with a firearm, because others can’t appropriately process rage and rejection, the addiction in some of these cases, just adds another complication and/or higher risk of escalation of violence and increased risk for fatalities.

If people aren’t afraid of going to prison, due to being violent or possessing or abusing drugs, don’t have the respect for the sanctity of life, either for themselves or someone they are supposed to love, where their rage of a partner’s rejection outweighs them rationally knowing that their loved ones have a right to their lives and peace of mind, an order of protections don’t mean anything, if it’s applicable.

And in a lot of recent cases, orders of protections weren’t applicable.

Because, people who had no criminal history, have killed their families, loved ones, friends and/or peers and then lots of times, themselves when a relationship ends or feeling some kind of rejection romantically or platonically.

Or when feeling rejected in school, their workplaces or their houses of worship.

More initiatives are needed to try and prevent these horrific tragedies.

And they are needed NOW.

And starting these kind of initiatives, when people are young and being constructively educated, lifelong.

Note: I will NOT publish anything that’s not constructive. Thanks….

An Open Letter to Val Kilmer…

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Yo Val,

I usually live my life, according to quote, pictured above.

I felt bad when I heard you had throat cancer.

And I’m happy for you, that you’re in remission.

I’ve never talked about you or thought over the years, cause I have kind of an actual personal reason to dislike you, that extends beyond the fact you were like the fucking WORST Batman, like ever.

Instead of trying to make comments regarding a certain celebrity, who just sadly passed on Friday, June 8th, 2018, that DOES NOT help anyone, just PLEASE shut the fuck up, ok?

And ya wanna know why I know you can be a complete asshole???

23 years ago, I used to work for a company that was subcontracted by BA, where we managed their frequent flyer program.

And so 23 years ago, I went to work, UNPAID and off the clock, cause you were making your personal assistant, absolutely MISERABLE, over a few thousand frequent flyer miles, that YOU failed to properly claim.

So instead of disrespecting someone who just died and their loved ones, friends and fans, maybe just worry about not being a dick to people in your own circle, OK?

You wanna help people???

Maybe try doing activism for throat cancer prevention.

But with like Batman movies AND suicide prevention, you kinda suck at it.

So fucking knock it off, OK?

Respectfully, ME and 90% of the universe…

How to help those who are suicidal when they DO NOT want anyone to know that they are….

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1-800-273-8255 National Suicide Prevention Hotline
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org
http://www.befrienders.org (for people who live outside the U.S)

Important Disclaimers: I’m not a clinically trained professional in medical or mental health issues. I will always urge someone if they or someone they love is capable of hurting and/or killing themselves or others, to seek immediate professional help in appropriate acute facility or call 911 or emergency services in your country of residence.
***

Because of the type of activism I do, when people talk about those who they love who’s depression was fatal to them, the hardest answer I have to give (see above disclaimer) as a non professional, is when they tell me that the loved one did that and there were no clear cut signs.

In fact, they seemed happy or at peace.

I’m not the only mental health activist I’m sure to point one tragically heartbreaking thing to admit, to those who’ve never struggled with suicidal ideation, can’t comprehend.

If someone you love or care a lot about, has been struggling with severe depression and even regardless if they’re on medications and have been evaluated and are actively seeking treatment, is still struggling and then all of a sudden, they seem so much better, one of the most hard things to understand is that they can APPEAR to be doing okay, if not great.

That happens because for some and some people between illness and depending on how much suffering they are going through and how well they hide it are happy, not because they are getting help, but because they’ve decided to end their suffering, once and for all.

(Important Note: I’m going to stop here, on purpose, I had written the above, YESTERDAY and had  felt this was going to get too  wordy, when I woke up this morning, I found out that another celebrity this week,  had died by suicide.

The sad irony is, this blog I only attempted to start writing yesterday, after seeing a psychologist interviewed on CNN where she discussed missed signs of the suicidal, but didn’t address this one. I’m in NO WAY discounting the importance of clinically trained professional help or input. And CNN did do a better job of suicide awareness on their website today, due to a loss of an admired contributor of theirs today, due to suicide)

What again, is that sign???

The person seemed HAPPY.

People who are balanced and genuinely happy, their depression doesn’t become fatal for them, at least at risk of it being caused by their own despair and then their own action that leads to their death.

The bizarre phenomena of why people miss this in suicidal loved ones who don’t want anyone to know that they’re suicidal, is because they mistake relief for happiness.

Or sadly and it’s hard to explain to those who aren’t or haven’t ever been suicidal, they ARE actually happy,  because they know their suffering is going to end, because they’ve specifically made a plan and usually means and a date and they are relieved, if not overjoyed to know their suffering is going to end.

It’s also compounded with the trickiness of even the most mentally balanced person who still suffers mental illness and/or from severe depression and anxiety, of NOT wanting having to hear of all the reasons why it’s NOT okay to take their life/die from suicide/depression being fatal to them and they go out of their way to show their doing okay, if not great, because they either in lapse of ration of their own wellbeing and  don’t want to hear it and/or people don’t know how to help them, so they don’t ask because they don’t know how or what to say, if they’re in trouble and they’re too afraid of the potential ramifications should they be honest of how devastatingly depressed and devoid of hope that they are experiencing.

And again, while no one is to blame if someone’s depression is deadly to themselves, if they’ve heard another, say “suicide is the easy way out” or anything that could cause further depression and guilt, those of us who know people who feel that way, are less likely to share how much they’re unbearably hurting inside.

And the stigma is bad enough, it’s worse in people who are suicidal and are a parent, where it’s thought even more so to be the ultimate act in selfishness.

I’m not trying to make an argument for someone to die from suicide, I’m trying to explain for those who NEVER have thought about it, why some people die that way or why some of us TRIED, even though we have loved ones that we were going to leave behind.

There is a time sensitivity to this blog, as usually when there is celebrity suicides, such as what happened this week and with Robin Williams, there’s an increase in non celebrity suicide deaths.

In this case, I’m going to concentrate on just  TWO of many,  major factors with some people and it usually is a factor in both, when it comes to celebrities or high powered people who die due  to suicide.

They just lost a loved one either by death or breakup and they don’t get help because of stigma and/or they don’t think their suffering isn’t going to end without them dying.

In addition to people who are at risk from suicide, needing professional help, sometimes the person, such as in a long term (or even short term) loving relationship, even lovingly and thoughtfully dissolved can increase risk of death, in addition that stigma of suicide and mental health can create a deadly situation.

I need to be clear, again,  it’s no one’s fault, when people die this way, as far as death by suicide, when a relationship ends.

I need to be clearer, sometimes the person, in addition to needing acute intensive professional help but who won’t get it, the person who cannot help them, sometimes, if not a lot of times, is the person who is a party of a relationship issue.

And it’s no one’s fault.

If that’s the case, a if you suspect someone is in danger to themselves, you can safely intervene, either softly and sensitively  by getting someone else (i.e. a good friend to that person, family member who’s sensitive to depression issues who will not resort to using guilt (this is why it’s best to get professional help, if you really suspect oneself or a loved one is suicidal) to personally talk to that person, and ask if they are thinking and/or wanting to die, only if it’s safe to do so or you can always contact above resources on the top of this blog for support and/or contact emergency services.

As while I’ve talked about this more in past blogs and will continue to do so, in future blogs, in addition to suicide prevention, which is something I am an activist for, I can NOT be any clearer when I say, sometimes you’ll/we’ll  miss signs because there wasn’t any signs to miss.

But it can’t hurt those you love by reminding them you’re a safe person to talk to, if they ever need it, whether they’re in crisis or not.

So let’s just keeping  about this more, in hopes to help those in crisis and those who love/d them, without any stigma, in hopes to physically and emotionally save lives,OK?

Note: Anything that’s not constructive to my readers or myself, will NOT be published.

Additional Note: I purposely, in honor of those who are celebrities who died of suicide this week, and will be now in the news constantly, did NOT want to name them, out of respect for them and their families.

Or for anyone who’s lost a loved one, while I can say as an activist in this blog on ideas or hopes for suicide prevention, to honor those who we lose and their loved ones, you honor their lives and the love you had for them, going forward, society should not sensationalize, condemn and/or dishonor them, in who they were and/ or  the way they died.

 

Physicians with biases ARE physicians who HARM, even if it’s unintentional…

 

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Disclaimers: I am NOT a clinically trained or credentialed medical or mental health professional. NOTHING I say should EVER be taken in lieu of professional medical and/or mental health evaluation or treatment of ANY condition.

I can ONLY put my opinions, where I hope to help people, where I have in guiding them, at the very best, simultaneously,  at the same time to get the best medical or mental health treatment, from trained clinical professionals, in an appropriate setting , such as what I do with gastric bypass patients in various scenarios with gastric bypass reversals, among other things.

BUT,  what I have to say about how various biases carried by physicians and the potential for physical and emotional harm, still needs further civil, respectful and responsible but sometimes when appropriate, critical discussion, not ONLY by patients but the actual medical and mental health professionals within their own  communities.

I ONLY believe though, when dealing with a provider who one might feel is showing bias that effects one’s care,  of discussion of potential  misbehavior, if  one feels that they’re being treated unfairly or unreasonably, because of that bias (I’m talking about appointments, not to the point where blatant physical or emotional malpractices have occurred) of filing a grievance, if a discussion doesn’t resolve the issue and/or finding another physician.

It is NEVER okay to threaten the emotional or physical wellbeing of anyone, including a physician or any provider, for biases and if depending on the degree of physical and/or emotional harm has occurred, if that’s an actual issue, there’s legal remedies one can look into and/or take.

That’s it, making or threatening a physician’s physical and emotional safety and wellbeing is NEVER okay (more will be elaborated about that, in the content of this blog).

Also note, I have people I associate with where they may find my communication style at best, offensive, because I’m kind of open with my various disabilities and with those disabilities, it’s difficult for me to be concise or write well, even if this topic definitely needs discussion and resolutions.

***

All I wanted to do last weekend,  was to  have an okay weekend.

Let me explain, as most people know, that due to my disabilities, that I don’t have anything normal in responsibilities, like people my age do.

But in my case, I kind of dread weekends, while my blogs have been both personally and as an activist, VERY serious as of late, it’s kind of scary where I live, because on weekends, when staff isn’t here, people are more likely to act out.

Even with cameras, unannounced drug sniffing K9s and security during nights and weekends.

While I explain to those few about explaining where I live,  that 1/2 the building where I live are good to have as neighbors, the other half is people who have issues with drug addiction and what it takes to support an illegal drug addiction (dealing and/or other illegal and unsafe behaviors to support an addiction of themselves and who they associate with) , if one’s on their way or headed to rock bottom, especially for poor people, it’s not a fun thing to live amongst, even if I have some empathy for non violent addicts.

The best way I can describe where I live is my building is like a stupid drug cartel that’s badly managed and a church had a baby.

Seriously and it’s NOT funny or fun to live in, even though I’m grateful for my housing.

Also as a serious activist, if I’m going to point out where doctors fail patients in under medicating patients or being afraid to use opiates as a last resort, I also have a responsibility as an activist, to do no harm, myself.

To either patients or providers or to anyone.

The last thing I’d want to give the impression, as an activist,  is that people can be complacent nor would I want to enable, when it comes to the potential of drug addiction or feed into a denial pattern, if they actually are in the midst of drug addiction or heading into drug addiction with either prescription or  illegal opiates.

I know it sounds like I’m digressing, please be patient, I will make my point when it comes to physicians and their biases and how it harms.

Because of all the clinical data I have to read, both as a patient and as an activist, who’s trying to find answers both to opiate addictions and obesity surgery complications, is by using Google.

So when last Saturday night,  it was in my suggestions on Google,  to check out a physician driven site to support and educate medical providers, especially as it applies to interventional pain management or obesity related issues (among many other medical topics but those were the 2 most talked about ones, as well as ones I’ve discussed ad nauseum in this blog in the past) , I didn’t need that site, to know that bias among physicians was horrifyingly pervasive and permanenting who apparently were WAY unaware that they had a few of these awful biases that I’m going to discuss in this blog.

I just didn’t need to see it on Saturday night, when my building was a hotbed of not life threatening criminal behavior due to drugs, but it still was scary because you don’t ever know when that’s going to escalate.

I happen on that physician site to read an article a blog that  a pain management specialist wrote,  who was trying to make a point on how tricky it is to do pain management using a popular stereotype that’s perpetuated not only with non physicians, but within the medical community.

Patient #1:  was a morbidly obese patient who misused opiates claiming she was under medicated, that she was treating who had  needed a double knee replacement and severe  back pain  due to a disc issue (and apparently her inability to stop eating for more than a minute)  and had mental health issues and when the physician pulled her meds due to her non compliance and her quite clearly expressing the patient having NO willpower whatsoever, that patient trashed her online, so she thought, as right after that happened, she received a bunch of negative reviews on a bunch of medical websites.

Patient #2: Very friendly thin patient perfectly compliant dying of cancer, who used a moderate amount of opiates sparingly, despite her severe intractable pain due to terminal cancer with mets and in this instance, the pain management doctor had a nauseating borderline reverence, for.

I will admit, that I’ve had that kind of prejudice similar to patient #1 even though I’m not known for compliance with most meds, other than narcs due to high tolerance (and how I’m resolving that, will be in another blog, soon).

But that blog by that pain management doctor, hit me way harder as an ACTIVIST.

This is what I know to be true, due to the  activism that I do.

Bias can kill patients not only from physicians even if it’s not intentional, due to stigma, as well as by,  non physician peers.

I get that all the time, when I have to talk to a gastric bypass patient with catastrophic complications, into what may be right for them, such as a a gastric bypass reversal, who’s going to die, has a BMI of 19, even with weight loss of 200 lbs and NO surgery to correct extra skin, so their BMI is actually even lower, when that’s taken into consideration, but they’re afraid of and what’s worse, is their current bariatric surgeon is afraid of doing a reversal, in case they become morbidly obese, again.

Where they are more likely to DIE from their catastrophic complications, before Obesity again could put them in mortal danger.

Or in the case because I’m a body diversity activist and find thin shaming repugnant, if I say that someone who’s thin, they’ll usually share their skinny shaming stories and if they’ve had a past or current history with bulimia and/or anorexia.

Or when I see within the weight loss surgery community, patients who get very thin because they’re terrified they’ll be fat again, not realizing that it’s not ideal, it’s actually unhealthy,  to be exercising intensely like an athlete, on 400-1000 calories a day, not only does that make them more at risk for exercise related injuries, it kills their metabolisms, in the long run, if not creates other health risks.

So doing behaving that way is no insurance policy that a bariatric patient won’t gain weight again or have any other severe health problems.

Or if they have bariatric surgical complications, quite a few bariatric patients actually think they deserved them, because they were fat in the first place and had to resort to bariatric surgery.

Or when patients who are morbidly obese to medical and mental health issues and want bariatric surgery or to lose weight, they sometimes become obese due to inactivity due to their health issues and their medications, they can’t have their total knees without losing weight or their bariatric surgeries and they can’t lose weight without either surgeries and are absolutely in a no win situation.

With weight stigma, especially when it comes to Obesity, it hurts both fat and thin patients.

With fat patients, they hate getting medical care, because if they go the doctor for strep, it’s going to be blamed on their weight.

And it shouldn’t be any surprise but it will be to providers, if they have fat bias, the patients who they are treating are FULLY aware of that and that’s why people of weight loathe to seek medical treatment which can sometimes kill a patient, but even at unfortunately, at best,  unnecessarily makes getting any kind of medical treatment, a lot harder than it should be.

It also hurts and potentially harm  thin patients, because they may less likely to think they could have health issues, and their physicians feel the same way, because if they’re a “healthy” weight, it’s presumed, that they’re actually healthy,  when they may not be.

With opiates due to stigma, if a physician has a patient who’s in intractable severe pain, there is a risk they will self medicate and possibly harm if not accidently kill themselves,  they engage in unsafe and unhealthy behaviors to treat their pain and/or they kill themselves, if they aren’t appropriately medicated and/or suddenly taken off their medication.

Especially now, with the opiate epidemic, patients who are compliant, but have been on opiates for a long time are now starting to die, because they find a dealer and/or patients are actually commiting suicide, becoming collateral damage because of the opiate epidemic,  due to unbearable physical pain, because they don’t feel they have any other options and they have no quality of life and they have no options as a last resort for pain.

Absolutely NO physician should be congratulating themselves or encouraging as a positive behavior,  that a terminal patient has great “willpower” by not using opiates for severe intractable pain, if medications are working properly, when the risk of addiction in that patient is next to nothing and the patient is ONLY afraid to take opioids, because of stigma due to drugs, and would rather die a horrifyingly  painful death than be considered a drug addict due to stigma , even if the patient is going to DIE.

NONE OF THIS IS OKAY!!!

I’ve said this before, as a medical activist.

HOW and WHY, in this evolved technological era, why are people becoming MORE backwards in our society, has to be discussed openly, without stigma.

BUT medical and mental health professionals take an oath to try and not do harm.

IF they have personal biases, regarding fat patients, challenging patients to treat or mental health patients and/or any other kind of  biases, who are coming to them for any kind of treatment, they OWE it to their patients, to give them the best possible care.

And they can’t do that, if they have ANY kind of  preconceived particular bias towards ANY population of people.

In the defense of physicians or any medical or mental health provider, while I’m not excusing bias that limits their ability to care for their patients, they shouldn’t have to worry about physical or emotional harm, either.

Also patients LIE, like all the time or don’t even realize the dangers if they are aren’t lying a lot, but about things that may seem trivial to them but it’s not and it makes them a liability to both themselves and possibly their providers, especially one who is prescribing narcotics to them.

But even if 9,999 out of 10,000 patients are lying, especially about what they’re actually ingesting, all of them deserve to be given the benefit of the doubt, especially if the 10,000th patient may be, if not, is actually telling the truth

Every patient deserves an individual patient tailored approach to their unique physical makeup being able to feel safe with their medical and mental health providers.

Every provider should feel that they don’t have to worry about being physically or emotionally harmed, because they say something or take a course of an action that a patient doesn’t agree with.

Patients should just stop seeing that provider in that case, in case of negligence or harm, consider a legal remedy, that’s it, if a reasonable (as patients can be respectful, responsible and critical at the same time) discussion or resolution is NOT possible with a provider and/or seek a different provider, if possible

But pretending that bias doesn’t exist, that it can harm patients in their ability to get appropriate (and sometimes lifesaving) treatment of their health conditions,  that resolving one addiction and not addressing the nature of addiction, can lead to another, is harming people, both patients and providers, alike.

Because we aren’t having the responsible and respectful dialogues we need to, as as society,  because of STIGMA.

So while I will hold a physician to the hippocratic oath, it couldn’t hurt anyone, if we actually all took it.

Note: Constructive feedback, only.

Also note: Again, I believe in both any of the obesity surgeries AND opiates, as an absolute last resort. I’m not against any weight loss surgery, I just have a unique situation in being one of the more long term gastric bypass reversal patients out there, of being asked about that, a lot.

As it applies to opiates, I have lost people I’ve cared about due opioid addiction as well as see it in other case, such as described above, ruin people’s lives, so again, it bears repeating, I’m not trying to feed into or enable the opioid epidemic, as an activist.

Although, I’m also not going to apologize for being supportive of invasive medical treatments for different health issues, i.e. both obesity surgeries and opiates, but I will always strongly urge people when you take drastic action, make sure you have a long term plan, are well educated and are well supervised, medically (and mentally), life long.

Nor am I going to apologize for the length of this blog, due to the sensitive nature of what I addressed in this blog,  that I had to so  comprehensively and fairly, to do  justice both to patients and providers, alike.

And if you saw at times, what frightening words or phrases sometimes end up in search engines for my blog, well you’d understand better, why I have to have such a lengthy in depth disclaimer.

Thanks!!!

“The Wrong And The Feckless”….

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Trigger Warning/Disclaimers: This particular blog could possibly upset those who lean both more liberally and conservatively, alike.

Do me a favor, as I’m NOT wrong in what I’m about to say, save any hate and if you could wait til sending me a death threat (I usually get them with political posts, especially when defending people who affiliate on both sides ) or having a desire to kill me, wait till I get my DNR notarized tomorrow, in case ya fail, as what I’m trying to say, could not only help oneself, but someone you love or care about.

Thanks!!!

***

In this week’s episodes of the celebrity edition of  “The Wrong And The Feckless” (something I made up, but kinda already exists unnamed on the various and vast media platforms aren’t I clever??), that should’ve NEVER starred  Valerie Jarret, Ivanka Trump OR Kim Kardashian West, all three who didn’t ask and DID NOT deserve being in what’s becoming the world’s worst REALITY media show/reality soap opera/REALITY, like EVER, we’ve got somethings that have to be discussed about this week’s “episodes” , obviously.

As well as going forward, OK?

It’s NOT okay, it’s horrible and repugnant to say, if not think racist and xenophobic remarks and in this instance, I’m talking about Roseanne Barr, but this isn’t the first time she’s hurled hateful racist stuff to another woman, among the hateful stuff she’s hurled for years to many others, which I find baffling, as her politics really are way more Bernie Sanders, than they ever been like 45.

It’s not okay, to say vulgar hateful misogynist remarks, as well as the entire quote because “putting on a tight dress and go see you’re father”(I know that’s not verbatim even though I saw the show this morning) is NOT okay, Samantha Bee, it is just disgusting to have done that to Ivanka.

And for the New York Post, Kim Kardashian West did NOT deserve the slut shaming sexist repugnant crap on your cover of your paper today (it’s still 5-31-18 in the U.S).

It doesn’t matter where you lean politically, if there’s any hope we’re going to have any chance as a society of being okay, we have to learn how to NOT be hateful to one another, regardless of race, religion, political preference, gender and socio-economics, and weight (whether it’s fat bashing or thin/skinny shaming) leanings/preferences, just because you don’t agree with them or who they are.

And with the above being said, it’s still  difficult to think and not be somewhat horrified, that 2 strong and smart women and a popular publication, didn’t think about what they said before they went on Twitter, on their television show and a publication, (as that cover had to at least go by one woman, before it was published), respectively which all involved not only all kinds of hateful rhetoric but again, that pesky sexist, if not misogynist hateful crap from one woman to another woman.

It’s even more perversely pathetic, when a multi-complex disabled activist has to call women out, who are not only way more successful in all areas of their lives, that I could NEVER be.

And it’s sad for me, for someone where I admired Roseanne Barr prior to 2008, as a comic, activist, entrepreneur and actress.

I LOVE Samantha Bee, her show is “liberal cognitive crack” for people like me, but I don’t know how I can watch her show anymore, because I don’t have to be a fan of Ivanka Trump, to know what was NOT only said, but now, DONE to her was AWFUL and I don’t know something like that could be even written, if not aired, by anyone, but especially a mostly female writing staff, but whether or not she wrote it, Sam was the one who said it on national television.

I also do read New York Post online on occasion, bye bye, to that, too, as KKW was honestly trying to help someone, even if she was sunbathing nude on a beach, she didn’t deserve that cover.

Now, ONLY if I could find a way, given that I’m not social media much but still can’t manage to find a way without going off the internet completely, on how to avoid anymore “The Wrong And The Feckless” episodes that air almost minute by minute basis.

And stay tuned, as if you thought you hated me or this blog before, wait til in a near future blog, I address acts of misandry and androphobia, yet again, by famous people and also perpetuated by the media,  regardless of gender of those who are committing it and/ or political preference.

Note: I won’t publish (unless, they’re like moronically hilarious directed at me, personally and that’s only a maybe) hateful comments.

 

 

Permanently Divisable???

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May is Mental Health Awareness Month.

While I’d rather be writing about that, in a broader sense, then again of  how drastically people are becoming so disconnected, distracted, damaging , if not dangerous, drastically, because of social media addiction and social media sociopathy.

I’m not saying ALL people on social media or those who are on it constantly have that problem.

But SO many DO.

And while I’ve made a small mark on the internet both personally and as an activist to make sure the things that I’ve done that were bad or crisies not with the realm of my control, were a learning lesson that people could learn from and not have to make some of the same horrible mistakes or gone through the same heartbreaking things that I have.

But I own what’s bad about me, stopping short of tattooing a warning label on my head about myself.

I keep to myself a lot, now.

For many reasons, many I’ve discussed in this blog this year.

While I get though that some of us with diagnosed mental health issues, have dysfunctional or abnormal thought processes,  most ARE NOT dangerous or damaging to others, if not ourselves.

And I’m REALLY sick of having to say that, over and over again.

And it’s disheartening to keep hearing  people online and offline of how casually they  throw the word “crazy’ around.

Like all people with diagnosed mental health issues are a ticking time bomb full of racist xenophobes who could commit violent acts of crimes, at any time, to any population of innocent people,  that’s if we don’t die alone from our addictions, first.

The truth is, most of us who have diagnosed mental health issues and know it, could never hurt anyone or those of us who have, it wasn’t permanent, intentional or with malice.

The truth is, someone like me, where I now literally stick out like a sore infected thumb externally because of my appearance, if I had it in me to put more effort in what I look like, most people, just by what I say, either online or in person, wouldn’t NOT know have any invisible disabilities if I didn’t talk about my private life.

I get away with it, ONLY and now,  because I’m not addicted to social media or a smartphone.

I find that TERRIFYING in dealing with others, now.

I have long term and short term memory issues, I have unmedicated Bipolar 2 disorder and no filter, most of the time.

But I still manage to be able to on occasion, when I am able to get out, to have an open minded conversation and connect with people, both superficially and meaningfully with people I have absolutely NOTHING in common at all, on ANY level.

It’s not like you really get any meaningful lasting  emotional reward for trying to change people into being more like minded like oneself, when there is no harm to oneself or others, for thinking or believing differently.

In other times, where people could find common ground and have a “agree to disagree” stance, most don’t have that skill set, any longer.

And most people don’t get, you can care about people, but not get lonely, especially nowadays where people, sometimes at best with not good intentions, but even with no malice but still “frenemy” in nature, , with those they don’t care about and even with those who they do care about you, but for the wrong reasons, if one is open about themselves, one’s vulnerabilities either use to hurt them, get satisfaction out of their heartache  and at worst, kill them.

Because saying whatever you think, at the exact moment you think it and what you look like saying it and when a lot of what’s being said is toxic to at least a population, is NOW normalized because of using social media for anti-social reasons and some people are unable to recognize those traits in themselves, even if they are fully functional people in so many aspects of their lives.

Or they know they are spreading vitroilic rhetoric but don’t care.

And it’s really hard to escape that kind of toxicity and hatred, even for people like me, who are self isolating and are rarely on social media.

As well as the damage that is being caused to humans on a cognitive level due to social media addiction, as well as physically.

I just hope we can find the good again in people and at best be apathetic to what we don’t agree on, wherever we meet them and just not bother with people that we may not have any common ground with.

And STOP throwing out the word “crazy” with stigma, just because you don’t agree with someone.

Even if they’re being a jerk at best or hateful person at worst.

As that MOST  of the time is a character defect, not a mental health one.

Even though all people have mental health issues at one time or another, in different degrees.

And it doesn’t help anyone for to meanly or hatefully point out that some of us metaphorically, are shacks with a fire ant infestation, who just want to be left alone or live their lives in peace or without prejudice, when those who recreationally or hatefully calling others out are mansions built on a toxic waste dump sites.

Let’s just concentrate for our sake on what we have in common with KINDNESS, before people permanently divide from almost EVERYONE, as NO any  two people, let alone a large group of people  have a completely shared beliefs and thoughts, in and about EVERYTHING and EVERYONE.

Note: I will NOT publish anything that’s not constructive. I’m all for lively dialogue, I’m just saying stop stigmatizing all bad behavior as mental illness and stop hating on one another for recreation and promoting an atmosphere where those who do have deadly rage due to rage and rejection, are more prone act on it, in the social media era. Thanks!!!

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