“Let’s start by, making it clear, who’s the enemy here and we’ll show them, that it’s NOT them, who’s superior /It’s gonna be bad, it’s gonna be wrong, it’s gonna feel GOOD……”
Thievery Corporation “Marching the Hate Machines Into The Sun”
I, remember when I first saw the above video, it had to be about 5 years ago, and ironically it had been shared on Facebook, before the era of timeline when people were still sharing things on their wall, if you remember, life on Facebook before timelines.
And while I knew the video had some relevance to me and many others, it was the first time I heard the song played in video and let myself dwell on that, because I wasn’t ready to think I had a MAJOR problem with social media, when I already knew that I did.
SO…. I just concentrated on the music making me feel my manic depressive episodes had a theme song. And nothing else, even though I watch the video, often, in the last 5 years.
That what I just shared above, will be relevant, it’s just gonna take me like always, a little bit of time and whole bunch of words to make my point.
Now, it also bears mentioning that when I refer to social media, for me, I’m talking about Facebook, as while I’m on Twitter, to link/”promote” my blog, that I know there’s all kinds of social media, like Imgur, Reddit, etc.
That’s just too much choice in social media, for my already foggy, “Bermuda Triangle for a brain” head, though I just kind of have tendency to stick with Facebook, even though I struggle with that, and I DEFINITELY have a love/hate relationship with Facebook.
I had stumbled on this little gem on Monday of an article, had thought about making it a discussion question on my Facebook timeline, because the takeaway from it, is that most people feel bad about Facebook because it makes them feel inferior and/or that they are jealous.
(I, probably should add, an important nugget of info. I AM an internet addict, I’ve been one since I got a computer almost 20 years ago, and I discovered AOL. Just try to be patient, as I’m gonna EVENTUALLY make a major point. It should also be mentioned after freaking out about all the HATE on Facebook, which I nicknamed “Hatebook”, I wrote a major rant about all the hate between people online, as a status update, on Monday night and went offline on Monday night and will not be online much as I really need a break from social media, the news and what the media and Facebook THINKS is newsworthy or relevant, as well as the animosity regarding politics of all kinds, here in the U.S. and on social media, is just more negativity than I can take or deal with)
The biggest problem I have with social media, or as in my case with Facebook, at least as it applies to myself , is not the feeling of jealousy or envy, because in my case, if I’d be jealous over anyone who had an advantage of me, there’s about 99.5% of adults who can drive a car, raise their kids and keep a job and that’s just WAY too many people for me to be JEALOUS of.
So, I didn’t ask any discussion questions on Monday about the article, because I knew it would be hard for others to to answer honestly as well as the whole Facebook turning into Hatebook debacle . And I get why it would be hard to answer questions that people don’t want to ask themselves that the article brings up on the above link, let alone comment on it publicly. That’s if Facebook would even show it in people’s newsfeeds and didn’t think it would, considering the content.
One of the biggest problems that I have in the era of social media, is the feeling of being manipulated, knowing that I am, and still letting it get to me.
And while Facebook does a great job of manipulating people, they aren’t totally at fault. There wouldn’t be a supply, if there wasn’t a demand.
And manipulating people has been around for a really long time, to sell products, services and ideas, whether it’s professional or personal manipulation.
Facebook is just one of the BEST at it and the most successful at manipulating others. While I consider myself a “Google” girl, and I know they do that too, Facebook is way more in your face about it.
If you’ll pardon the horrible pun…..
The problems that people have because of social media or looking for a cure with social media, and human beings when almost everything we need to know has a digital and/or advanced electronical delivery system is multifaceted and complex. I can hit what I think are biggest issues, and we can go from there.
We’ve sadly though, become a society of not so closeted social media voyeurs and exhibitionists. People pick and choose about who they care about and who’s just an audience to them, so callously now a days.
There’s already a social media aspect to psychiatry and there’s already a great need for more research in place, of how damaging our dependence on technology, actually is to ourselves and how we relate to other human beings. Both online and offline. And how we can evaluate and treat people who have this as a major issue/addiction/obsession in their lives.
I understand I didn’t discover that, the problem is, what to do, when internet and social media addiction isn’t talked about very much.
And it definitely needs to be talked about more, in great detail.
I knew within 2 days of getting a computer, in November of 1996, that I was going to have a major problem with internet addiction, it’s something I rarely talk about, though.
And unlike most junkies, I can handle a non social media aspect of using the internet. Meaning I could take internet breaks (for a couple of days) and I did, from almost the start, of not touching a computer, except at work on Fridays. I still take social media internet sabbaticals, all the time.
I managed not to touch a computer or go anywhere near the internet for an ENTIRE year, after my suicide attempt in August of 2008. While I didn’t have any choice for a little over a month, I did have 11 months where I did have the choice and chose not to. I was too out of it, I knew I was too broken and too vulnerable to be ANYWHERE NEAR A COMPUTER (I didn’t know either, at the time, as I was still too overly medicated, that people could go online on other devices, let alone knew what Facebook even was, when I came back online in late August of 2009 and joined but was rarely online until early 2010, when I was out of the mh system and not overly medicated, any longer).
The problem is that social media, while has been a major blessing, it’s also had a major negative impact on my life. Some of that is my fault and or due to my barriers and I own that. But a lot of the issues people have with social media and while their issues vary, the consequences can have a horribly negative impact on our lives.
You’re probably wondering when I’m going to make my point and then when I hit a nerve (if I haven’t already) , either wanna let me have it, so you’ll discount my crappy writing style, my mental health and/or cognitive disabilities, or many of my other faults, as what I’m saying could NEVER happen to you.
The problem is, if you really do some soul searching, you’ll find that it ALREADY is a major problem, for a lot of us. Social media addiction and/or (not just for those of us, who already have mental health diagnoses) socially media induced mood and personality problems already DO exist and are in abundance.
Unfortunately, while I can tell you what the problems could be, I can’t tell you what the CURE is. At least the cure for YOU. I’m not saying NOT go on social media websites, and chances are, that most people who have this as addiction and/or major issue in their lives, don’t have the luxury of NOT being on the internet.
Or more bizarrely, that sadly, what will possibly and/or most likely help you will come from the internet, if you finally realize that you have a problem.
I went to use Google for articles on social media addiction, after I started this blog, tonight. Some were articles, some were blogs. While there are some good links and good advice, and I’ll post them, the problem is that, I can’t do that without risking manipulating my readers that way, while I don’t make money from this blog, WordPress does and so does any link that I put on here. But some of the advice dispensed in the links below, could be helpful.
I have to trust that if you realize that you have an internet and/or social media addiction, that you’ll seek “in real life” professional guidance from a clinically trained professional.
Not real help from a complex disabled blogger. Not from Dr. Drew or Dr. Phil or any of the internet psychological superstars. A real life and offline clinically credentialed professional. Who evaluates and treats you, in person.
I can only hope that this will start a badly needed dialogue about social media and internet addiction. It’s just kinda messed up , as while I wouldn’t hold an AA meeting in a bar, I wouldn’t hold an OA meeting at a buffet or GA meeting in a casino, that to get a dialogue going, it needs to be done ONLINE.
For those of you who don’t think you have a problem with internet and/or social media addiction, let me ask you the following:
Do you believe you can be you true self, both as you look and who you are on the inside, both online and offline?
Do you dream and/or fantasize in “social media” and/or Facebook and/or are preoccupied with any certain people on social media, both when asleep and/or awake?
Are you preoccupied with what you are missing online, and/or do others such as family and/or friends, comment on how much you are on social media and/or not paying attention to them when offline because the truth is, you are wondering what and who you are missing online ?
Do you need it explained to you that there’s not much difference between a “half truth” and a whole lie? Do you ever feel like you’re not your truest self on or offline or worse, you can’t be your authentic self? That NOBODY would like you, if you were your true self?
None of the above questions apply to you? Great, didn’t think so (now I’m choking on my own sarcasm, but I’m honestly trying to help). It’s okay, I can be the only person out of a BILLION who might have an issue with internet/social media addiction.
Alright, with the sarcasm out of the way, hopefully this will lead to an honest discussion that’s terribly needed.Even though I can’t in good conscience, promote it anywhere.
But if you build it, they will come, RIGHT? Or more like if you write it they will read it?…
Helpful and honest insight and/or critique is welcomed. As well as discussion for those who realize they have internet/social media addiction and/or depression/obsession or other problems from social media and/or being online too much.
Anything comments that could triggering to a reader will NOT be published. Thanks….