Well, I guess we all KNOW Victoria’s Secret, NOW!!!

(above pics of me taken 10-8-2016 DT East Miniapple in my ‘hood)

I know this is going to be shocking to Victoria’s Secret and L Brands management, but most of us larger women had  ALREADY known that Victoria’s Secret doesn’t love heavier women.

I just don’t know why Ed Razek , their CMO actually had to be so cavalier in admitting, specifically, in addition to calling out transwomen or what I just prefer to call them, women(which he did end up  rightfully apologizing to them), I guess us fatties are going to waiting awhile.

Above VS Angel tickertape oversized hoodie (in a size XL) that  I’m wearing in picture, when I bought it online in 2016, at the age of 45 1/2 and truthfully it’s nothing short of a miracle it fit me and I was a size 12 on average (I’m much larger now, that though will be a topic of another blog) and nothing else at the time, from VS would have.

I’ve always been fond though of their fragrances at both Victoria’s Secret AND Bath and Body Works.

I’ve always joked around that if I couldn’t be a Victoria’s Secret Angel, I could at least smell like one.

I’ve also less funny, privately have said, that Victoria’s Secret would have Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson prance down that runway before he’d let the gorgeous Ashley Graham, do so.

I think all body shaming is despicable, whether someone falls on the smaller or larger side of the spectrum.

And in my case, super relatable, where in the last 14 years I’ve been anywhere from a misses XS to a women’s 4x.

Other true body diversity activists like myself will call any kind of body shaming, including thin shaming, no one needs a CMO of huge organization to distract from hurtful rationales that he is spewing, of talking about his models being body shamed for being thinner, to excuse his disgust for those of us who are on the larger side.

The only thing is where I would NEVER call out for a boycott for any kind of conglomerate, is that I’ve been to the VS stores in Mall of America and other local suburbs and they ACTUALLY employ plus size women.

It’s one thing to not empower those women with not making clothing in their size, but to say it in the way he did, is inexcusable, especially given the fact the thought to apologize to one population of people but another, weren’t worthy of one.

As he owed an apology to all women, actually to anyone who buys anything from VS, who could be offended with horrible rhetoric, PERIOD!!!

I’m NOT though, throwing out the cute hoodie or all the stuff I love that I’ve bought at B&BW over the last few years.

But, I personally am not spending another dime in an L Brand owned store, either.

It’s too bad, as I have in the last few years been watching the VSFS and I love the music  that I’ve found due to the shows and some of the segments were really beautiful, as far as models and outfits.

It’s one thing to just cater a store to a certain population of people, that most of us have always understood, that.

But once you shame a population who could still shop at the store for things that are not restricted to size, well the shame ain’t on us.

It’s on you L Brands and your executive marketing team, who should’ve answered that question way less hurtfully, not just for your customers, but for your actual employees.

Regardless of age, weight or gender identification…

Note: Anything  that could be hurtful to ANY population of people, will NOT be published. So save and spare me (and everyone else)  your hate. Thanks!!!

 

 

 

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With bated breath …

Disclaimers: I am NOT  a clinically trained professional in medical or mental health or possess any kind of education or training in any form of law enforcement.

IF someone you know is capable of hurting themselves and/or others, please contact emergency services in your location, immediately.

***

I really wanted to title this blog “Hate Won”…

Because I’m really beginning to think that hate is winning out.

I’m also really beginning to think, that no matter what I or others say about learning how to agree to disagree, choosing apathy over hate and that NO matter what morally or ethically (there’s a difference with legal) transgressions that people do to another, we don’t have the right to pay back those transgressions with violent irreversible harm over another for those who have a predilection for crime or for those who snap (which quite a few domestic murder/suicides this year alone were committed by people with no legal history or history of mental illness) .

I thought about the very recent crimes that happened in the United States that triggered my writing this blog and realized it didn’t matter whether or not  I specified the crimes, well the crimes of course did matter, but the actual date’s crimes didn’t, for activism purposes, as this happens EVERYDAY, now.

I’m obviously NOT a psychiatrist who specializes in violent crime pathology.

You don’t need to be though, to have an opinion or if one has a desire  to try and help make the world a better place, to have an opinion.

Some of my blogs are meant to be “DBT on Demand” for those who refuse to seek treatment and try to bring awareness that their words and/or actions can be harmful, if not fatal to themselves and/or  others.

Some of the best advice I’ve ever been given has been by someone NOT familiar with my exact personal circumstances and was practically, if not, a total stranger.

Some of the best life saving advice that I’ve ever given (with above disclaimer that people in any kind of crisis need to be evaluated and treated by appropriate professionals, in appropriate facilities) is to people who I don’t know personally, but have found me because of this blog.

It just goes beyond my scope of comprehension, of how people can let unchecked rage due to rejection, that leads to deadly revenge or attempt to kill another.

For someone who’s been hated on by people, the majority of my entire life  because of weight and looks (being more on the unattractive side of the spectrum) most of my life, I’ve only turned rage inward and what I learned when I became a mother, untreated hatred even if it’s just limited to oneself, can have devastating emotional consequences on those who you love the most, no matter how unintentional.

I had to learn at a young age how to deal with rejection and while it wasn’t hurtful to others, it wasn’t constructive, either and it’s something some of us, especially for those of us who’ve really never fit in, have to check in with themselves and take personal inventory on how we react to that, so it does NOT  turn inward or externally to others, and sometimes people can do that on their own, others may need professional help.

It NEVER helps whether in the short or long run,  to retaliate either emotionally or physically against someone who you hate either because you loved them at one time and they emotionally hurt you or in a lot of cases now, where people want to retaliate against strangers who they have differences of opinions.

I’m trying to multiple things here, but one thing I should try to make clear, for a blog that’s intended to reduce violent crime, I’m going way out of my way to talk about LEGALITIES, because they cease to matter to an individual once they try to perpetuate violent crime.

I REALLY don’t want to write these kind of blogs, anymore.

But I still do, because I cannot bear to know that someone can try to go to work, to school, a place of worship or grocery shopping and never come back because they were murdered for one or many of multiple reasons that most people with a shred of ration and sanity could never commit, due to another’s hatred of something or someone.

I want to put it out there, in a way I’m capable and comfortable with, that exacting violent or really any kind of revenge, isn’t badass or noble, it’s quite COWARDLY and it’s the worst possible legacy one will leave and I really can’t understand why anyone would want to do that although I’m trying, in hopes for prevention of violent crime.

That it’s despicable shame that the energy used to hurt others can’t (although I’m TRYING) to encourage re-channeling of that negative to do something positively good for another/others.

Or at least to prevent harm to innocent people.

And again not everyone is going to love each other, but if you can’t find empathy, try apathy.

People cannot become desensitized to all this violence due to fear, even though it’s understandable because it’s too painful to think about this happening to your own loved ones.

So my challenge to you, my dear readers, as well as the rest of the universe is, everytime you have negative thought about any person in regards to race, religion, politics, gender identification/sexual preference and weight (whether it be people on the thinner or larger side of the spectrum) , try to find something positive about that person to counteract the negative energy to neutralize it.

Here’s an example: “That #@^^____!!! I hate #$^____, they can all jump off a bridge, as far as I’m concerned!!!”

Try this when having a thought like that to yourself (and maybe if and/or if you’ll ever be ready to something like that in public forum/fashion) “Hey that person is a human being, maybe I need to remind myself that before I pass judgment on ____ and _____ and____ as they aren’t hurting anyone or themselves, it’s truthfully, really none of my business”.

We aren’t born to hate.

Unfortunately though, we are conditioned to.

Unless one intentionally chooses to break that cycle of being a hater and the good news is you can.

Because something so small, could do so much for innocent others who are losing their lives daily, because people can’t contain rage from rejection and it leads to revenge.

There’s a good reason, I didn’t write a 3 word blog with a 3 word title called “Let It Go”.

Because people do many bad things based upon the “why”.

The where, what, how and who obviously matters, enormously as well.

So maybe if we try to break the cycle on hating, by teaching from the time people are young how not to  be hateful and how to agree to disagree with a no bullying/hate tolerance stance and reinforcing that lifelong, we may have a chance on reducing violent crime.

But until then, I wait with bated breath, for the next tragic news story, that’s bound to happen in this hate cycle our society is in.

Note: Anything that’s not constructive, will NOT be published.

How to NOT screw up any kind of an affordable housing search…

Disclaimers: I’m passionate about there being all kinds of affordable housing. I concentrate on the Twin Cities, where I live, but a lot that I say could apply for rooms in houses, condos and in apartments and one’s own apartment in the United States.

If one is in a crisis that’s not life threatening but that will lead to loss of a current residency, the best place to start is by contacting one’s local Department of Human services and they may be able to help.

As always, if someone is in a crisis physically or mentally, please seek acute help in clinical facility (i.e. a hospital) and they usually can help with ideas for potential housing retention or finding temporary housing once a patient has been treated.

I don’t ever mean to be mean spirited when it comes to this topic, I’m quite blunt though as there’s so much at stake, both for those who are looking for housing and for those who are providing it.

If I’m not clear about something, please ask for clarification before making an assumption. Thanks!!!

***
Here are the mistakes people make when looking for housing on a tight budget:

1. Not knowing their market…

Like at all. There’s no shame being on a tight budget. The problem arises when people have unrealistic expectations of wants vs. needs on what they can realistically afford.

2. Potentially insulting a reasonable and decent landlord by using an excuse for wanting to pay less than the market demands…

I see these kind of ads on Craigslist (more about that NEXT) where people use excuses like wanting to pay less for a room because their saving up for a house of their own, they want to travel, etc.

Yes, you dear potential renter may be an ideal person to live with. Most people though don’t rent out rooms in their homes or condos due to altruism, though.

If you wouldn’t go to a Burger King, a fancy steakhouse or car lot, expecting that kind of financial accomodation, why would anyone owe you space for super cheap, in what’s probably the most valuable asset financially and emotionally they own or will be paying off for decades or could be financially on the line if someone damages their property?

3. Where people look for housing…

Craigslist, Craigslist, Craigslist…

It may be a great place to get a cheap couch. It’s way less than ideal 95% of the time to look for a safe place to live.

Worse than that and heed this particular warning very carefully as I’m very clear about this, I see single women unsafely post pictures of themselves that are sort of risque, in nature. NO ONE ever asks or deserves to be raped or assaulted. But a lot of people both men and women on CL aren’t the greatest landlords,  and may have harmful predatory motives, even if you say that you don’t want any type of sexual/platonic relationship but you post a picture that’s more appropriate for Plenty of Fish, then it is for LinkedIn

Expect a backround check and do the same and realize as police officers say about speeding tickets, most people get away with speeding hundreds of times before they’re caught, use due diligence when looking for a place to stay and only a reputable landlord would do the same.

4. Having a super entitled ATTITUDE…

People expecting somewhere for almost free, not having any income source and having a long list of wants vs. needs, see above 1,2 and 3, again and #5.

When looking for housing, making it clear you’re NOT open to a backround or credit check, you don’t know the market, you have a list of demands that belong on an expensive housing show, is an open invitation like the above 3 points, except that you are good humor to what would’ve been a decent landlord, had you come off as potential decent tenant.

5. Not realizing the seriousness of looking for housing, that you would for ANY  of the most important decisions you’ll make, even if you’re not buying…

Where you look, where you live, who you live with matters. The same applies to you as a tenant, ENORMOUSLY.

So does the why and what you’re looking for in housing and being honest about past mistakes that could show up on backround check.

If you use a non vetted free site for housing, you get what you paid for, which at best is nothing, at worst is a total nightmare situation to live in,  or you don’t realize one is the nightmare themselves which either/or, which could put you in physical, financial and legal jeopardy.

Have enough respect to be a decent tenant, expect  to network (and have to work and research)  for reputable housing and housing like many things of value and held in the highest regard,  is NOT something people are just going to take your word for that you’re a good tenant and a good person, just like you shouldn’t take people’s word that they are a good landlord.

You wouldn’t get a decent job (or almost any job or anything of value) based upon one’s word, why would housing be any different?

If you can’t respect yourself enough to be a decent respectful tenant, think of what you’d want for a loved one, although that’s kind of difficult for people to do when in crisis of some kind, so get professional help for that, before making other major life decisions that could negatively impact your life or  innocent others, if you have barriers that make looking for housing that’s in your income bracket unattainable for reasons other than financial and there is a ton of resources in ones locale, usually that can help, at least as a place to start, if you don’t know where to.

I’m far from perfect. And I have housing from a non profit that believes in second chances, which I’ve proved I was worth that.

All I’m trying to say is realize you get what you put into a housing search, you get what you pay for and this is too important of a life decision to not be realistic and educated of what you can afford and where you can find it.

Peace.

Note: I welcome respectful dialogue or difference of opinions. Nothing triggering to myself or an innocent reader, will be published.

Please don’t waste my time or yours, with that kind of stuff. Thanks!!!

#DepravedIndifferenceInTheDigitalEra

Important Disclaimers: I’m not a clinically trained medical, mental health or in public safety professional. I’m just a concerned medical and mental health and violent crime prevention activist and blogger, at times.

A lot lately.

And for awhile now.

If you or someone you know, is in danger of hurting themselves or others, please contact emergency services (i.e. 911 if you’re in the United States) and other important crisis resources will be at the end of this blog.

***

With a title like this, I guess I need to make some clarifications, right from the start.

I’ve been around for almost a half of a century, now .

I know that people have been hateful and harmful from the beginning of time, let alone before computers, internet and smart phone eras.

But now so many people are being irrevocably mentally and medically harmed, if not having their lives violently taken from them.

Where no place is sacred, such as a school, a place of worship, a hospital, a government center, a daycare or workplace and playgrounds, to name a few.

Where no one is spared, whether they be a baby, child, teenager adult to elderly.

Regardless of political preferences, gender, sexual orientation/identification, religion, race, race and socioeconomics.

And  people from all walks of life, have the potential that they fufill ,to be predators, perpetrators of hateful actions and vile crimes (well not babies or very young children) and to be victims.

This is what I’m deciding to mainly focus on, going forward as an activist…

That the serious discussions that need to take place, that I’m a part of, as far as making an attempt to be a part of the discussion to make aware, that people are losing the ability to realize and respect the sanctity of human life.

That everyone should have a life that is free from physiological and psychological harm.

That we start instilling this in the young.

And have safety nets in place lifelong for human being the evaluation and treatment of people in crisis.

And that we as a society if we’re going to survive, let alone thrive, have to figure out how to respectfully agree to disagree.

That rejection, if it or anything else that leads to rage, people can get help so they don’t continue to harm and kill innocent people.

That they don’t continue to irrovacably interfere with another’s right to peace of mind.

It needs to be said, in an era, where there is so many murder/suicides and just such an increase in violent crime, as well as the increase in severe emotional abuse and bullying, that even the people without a history, even if they started out and throughout their life, that doesn’t mean much, if they end their own lives and others, violently.

Or they in secret or quite publically hate and shame on a population of people, whether it be online or offline.

I DO NOT  believe that everyone can love everyone.

But it needs to change  where people realize how much it can harm, if they ONLY  have compassion for people who they care about and who are similarly like minded.

In that case apathy is a lot better than contempt or hate.

And if nothing else, if one can’t be a part of the solution, please don’t be a part of the problem.

Because some people just for no reason are predispotioned to depravity.

And then there are others where for multiple reasons, their depravity is circumstantial.

But no less damaging, if not deadly.

Note: I hope this will lead to necessary discussions about having multiple initiatives in hopes to help humankind.

Any response that is hateful or not constructive to this topic will NOT be published.

http://www.befrienders.org

 

Mourning the death of a true hero and patriot: #JohnMcCain

I knew this day would come, but I wanted it to be later or like NEVER.

Obviously, that’s not reasonable or rational.

I know that I like most people feel a sense of profound loss, regarding the passing of John McCain, yesterday.

And my truest sympathies are of course to his family, friends and his colleagues.

But I also feel a sense of loss for everyone, including myself.

And I feel bad as while the rational side of me, wanted him to have more life for reasons that were beneficial to him and his loved ones, the not so rational part of me really truly feels like that in Washington D.C., we lost a visionary who fought to make things a safe and reasonable reality for our nation, who wasn’t afraid to do and say the right thing and while no one is perfect, he was a perfect patriot and statesman.

I consider myself a conservative liberal, which really doesn’t need that much defining in this blog.

I did write though a blog about John McCain about 9 months ago, while knowing he’d never see it, nor his family, I didn’t want to wait til his death to say or acknowledge my gratitude for his service.

Because I’m a fan of his daughter Meghan, and again, I didn’t and don’t think anything I put out in the internet universe will reach famous people, which is not my intention, that I wanted to still put out gratitude for her and her family sharing him with us.

I only hope his colleagues in both parties,  to honor his legacy, take stock of the tremendous courage he’s shown throughout his life put people, principle and patriotism before party.

So as sad as I am about his passing, the one thing that gives me hope is that both his life and death wasn’t in vain.

That his courageousness will live on through his beyond honorable service to our country and that it will bring much needed attention and resources for those who are still fighting Glioblastoma and those who’ve lost their lives from it.

Again though it bears repeating, my heart still aches for the loss of him, his suffering and his family, friends, colleagues and our nation who mourns him.

Rest In Peace, Maverick….

Note: Any comments that could be hurtful to myself or any of my readers regarding this tribute to a national treasure which John McCain was, will NOT be published.

An Open Letter to #AsiaArgento…

Trigger Warnings/Disclaimers: I discuss in this blog with some profanity, rape in both genders, as well as victims come in all genders, colors and because I have a major personal reason to discuss it, all shapes and sizes.

PLEASE don’t read if any of the above is a trigger and please ask for clarification before making an assumption. Thanks!!!

And as always, if you or someone you know is in medical or mental health crisis, please seek immediate professional help.

***

Dear Asia (and the few million people who definitely share the same attitudes),

I’m honestly not picking on you!!!

My heart hurts for you in what has to really a fucking shitty AWFUL 18 months for you.

I’m a disabled medical and mental health activist in regards body shaming (of every size) and suicide, who doesn’t like social media and I value  my privacy.

In 1996, TWO major things happened to me that I talk about, the first only recently, the second, a little more and both because of the paragraph above, NO ONE believes me.

In January of 1996, I was date raped. Well, more like I was supposed to go on a blind date,  meeting at his very nice apartment building,  with the plans that we would go out to lunch and in being naive when he, who seemed to be a nice and nice looking U.S. Army official wanted to show me his new Natuzzi sectional, ended up quietly, violently and quite humiliatingly got raped, orally, vaginally and anally.

Of course not on the expensive sectional which he wouldn’t want to mess up, but on his living room floor.

What he said was if I gave him what he wanted, he wouldn’t hurt me.

That was only partially true, because he violated me, where NO ONE could see it.

I was a 26 year old fat, single not considered attractive full time employed loving single mom of 1, I just wanted to get get out of it in one piece, so I could get back to get my 3 1/2 year old  son and continue on with my life.

In June of 1996, I had a business trip that I had to go to London. On my flight from O’Hare to Heathrow, I fucking shit you and everyone else NOT, Princess Diana was on my British Airways flight!!!

My one and only business trip, I pretty much told anyone and everyone about.

I told less than a handful of people about my rape until a few years ago when I became and activist of sorts and a blogger.

About 5 years after my rape, being sick of being verbally bullied my entire life, I decided to have bariatric surgery (and that’s a WHOLE other entire story that I’m not going to get into now) and while some great things did originally and initally happen, it didn’t have anything resembling a  happy ending .

Other than to say and it’s kind of important, that I got skinny shamed instead of fat shamed for a couple years and I hated (and still hate fat and thin shaming)  both equally.

And because of the mindfuck of that and having serious complications from that surgery, exactly (well as of 9 days ago ) I gave up custody of my kids to my parents (by then I was a single mom of 2) and tried to commit suicide, 10 years ago.

And while I had no previous extensive psych history prior to my attempt and my first psych hospitalization 2 1/2 weeks prior to my one and only attempt and nearly got institutionalized for it.

When I decided that what I went through and my children went through, shouldn’t be in vain (as I was a neglectful mother the last 2 years I had my children), I launched this non monetized blog of mine, exactly 5 years from the anniversary of my suicide attempt.

So unfortunately, I know all to well from victim shaming, from parental suicide, suicide and mental health shaming and body shaming.

This is what I’m hoping to appeal to you for and I don’t know any other way to do it, even though I cherish and need my privacy.

Words and actions, lack of actions, MATTER.

Unfortunately, while what I think what Harvey Weinstein did is despicable, everytime people allude to the fact that he was/is a  big, fat and ugly monster, they perpetuate horribly wrongly,  that only unattractive people are perps and that they could NEVER be victims.

And that can kind of horribly feed into the horribly damaging myth, that rape is  a crime of passion, because it’s NOT,  it’s a horrific crime of where its intent is  to do horrific humiliating horrible physical and emotional damage to another human being.

While both are extremely painful for me and others like me, who don’t have a voice, hence why I blog, it’s a million times easier for me to talk about my suicide attempt and nearly getting committed,  than it is for me to talk about my rape.

I know that hurt people hurt people, so I’m trying to say this to you or anyone it could apply in the least judgemental way, as possible.

Because, for #MeToo for it fufill it’s mission, it HAS to be inclusive of all human beings who are victims/survivors.

Otherwise, it’s at risk of people who don’t have a voice, still at risk, due to not getting support, let alone, not being believed.

 

If you don’t believe me, use a search engine and try a find a meme using the words: fat women rape.

Or that it’s made to be a horribly unfunny joke and/or unfunny stereotype when a man not of the age of consent, is raped by an older powerful attractive  female.

It’s horrific of what’s out there and the after effects of rape  trauma can have the effect of victims ending up with eating disorders on opposite sides of the spectrum but not as far apart, as people think when it comes to  Anorexia to Super Morbid Obesity, as well as being at risk for addiction issues and  sometimes heartbreakingly it leads to suicidality.

For a multitude of reasons.

There has to be a better way to talk about predators,  without potentially shaming people who are victims/survivors where the only thing they share is a body type or an attractiveness classification, that’s what I’m trying to get across.

And while you have made great strides with #MeToo, if victims end up perpetuating the same crime or a different one, their voices and stories (the victims, if they are able to speak about it) need to be told as well.

Otherwise we don’t have a prayer of ending the vicious rampant cycles of rape, violent physical assault and sometimes homicide, sometimes suicide, sometimes murder/suicide regardless of genders, socio-economics, age, race, religion, sexual preference, sexual identification and species (as a dog was raped in Los Angeles several days ago).

I could go on and on, but I’m sure no one really wants me to and I certainly don’t.

Thanks for your (and anyone’s elses)  time and patience in reading this.

Respectfully, Lisa

Note: As always, but especially due to the sensitivity in nature of topics discussed, any comments that could be triggering to any of my readers, will NOT be published.

When it’s without a doubt, NOT going to get easier……

Disclaimers: This blog is both to achieve personal points and an activism goal. I do talk about appearance and weight.

I ask if any of the above, as I defend people to be of whatever weight they feel is in their best interest (meaning whether they believe in weight loss or being any size of the spectrum without stigma) as well as appearance, such as whether one wants to be glammed up or if they’re more like me and I look like I climbed out of under a rock, even with showering and fresh clean clothes on, that if any is a trigger to anyone, PLEASE  don’t read.

***

Above meme is a current self portrait of sorts…

Well I guess if one is going to be picky, an internal one.

It’s not that I’ve haven’t been open on my internet spaces, of gaining a lot of weight, NOT really caring much that I have and that I look like the love child of Jabba the Hutt and Bride of Chucky, it’s that I’m okay with it, which is completely socially UNACCEPTABLE.

In fact it’s SO socially unacceptable, that to admit it, makes me looked more unglued mentally, than I was 10 years ago (you’ll have to read my very 1st blog on WP, to find out the deets for that).

As I get older though and more wiser, for me at least, what’s considered unacceptable to others, i.e. gaining weight (even though I’m trying not to gain anymore and/or lose a little bit and DO NOT want any weight loss advice, of like any kind) or that I don’t look the greatest, as it’s a symptom for me of something that it’s a mixed blessing and mixed bag of sorts, to accept.

My current disability sets are getting worse, as far as self care is concerned and I don’t love it, but have to accept that’s where I’m at and take personal inventory of what I’m capable of, in some kind of action.

Meaning what bothers me the most, is the failure on my part to do more than just get by, that I can’t take care of others.

That if I would die, I’d have nothing to give to anyone in either a legacy to be proud of or any type of financial support to my children and my parents, who I owe EVERYTHING to.

That as an activist, it’s getting unbearable to see the news daily, of all the unconscionable acts of violence and tragedies.

So,  I’m taking stock of what I can do to be a better activist and to be better personally that’s focused  in the medical and mental health arts and sciences, and what I can do to better my finances,  before I get anymore disabled.

And being grateful at least that if I can’t be the best I can be on the outside, internally I’m mentally intact and can strive for more.

And that’s okay…

Note: Please NO food, diet and/or fitness advice. Thanks!!!