It's not what you are eating, it's what's eating you…

unnamed (1)

Important Disclaimers: I am NOT a clinically trained medical or mental health professional or in matters of public safety.

If you or anyone you know, poses a threat to oneself or others, please contact emergency services (again, half my readers aren’t in the U.S. and aren’t even in North America).


When I saw above linked articles, I was really sad.

What made me even more sad, was that I wasn’t surprised.

I’m not trying to come off like  I’m this uncredentialed, unrealized and unappreciated genius, cause I’m not.

I’m saying though as an activist/blogger who writes about medical, mental health and violent crime prevention awareness, that I’ve been worried that  it was possible people could/would weaponize the virus itself, a vehicle or actual weapons intending to wound, if not possibly cause fatal harm either online and/or offline, psychologically and/or medically consequentially, in and around homes, places of businesses and in acute care facilities, including, if not especially in and/or around a  hospital.

And I’m also saying that it’s very possible that violent actions are going to still escalate and while I cannot be the person, nor do I think only one person can help solve this, we all must try as hard to be  vigilantly working  on our mental health, tenacity, level of patience and preparedness, as we move through this unprecedented crisis.

As tragic as so many people dying from COVID-19 due to the actuality of the virus, deaths are just as tragic because of it.

The next pandemic will be in mental health

Important Disclaimers: I am not a medical or mental clinically trained professional, if someone is in danger of hurting themselves and/or others, please contact emergency services, immediately.

Okay, back up to a few days before Valentine’s Day 2020.

My boyfriend comes home from work where he works for a global shipping company, and asks me “Guess what we’re getting slammed with in packages???”…

I reply back “Guns”.

He’s like “how did you know???”…

Because by then, that Wuhan based physician who tried to warn us about the virus had already passed away.

Because while I’m  not a clinically trained medical or mental or have any form of education in public safety, that in an uncertain time, that has become even more uncertain and scary to so many in the last 6 weeks , a gun would give stable people, possibly a feeling of some control, in a constructive way to protect their people and their possessions.

It would give those who were less stable, a tool to feel more in control in what was looking to possibly be to them, more uncertainty than they could bear.

You see now those who are reporting the news are in the news because of COVID-19.

We’ve seen famous, wealthy, noteworthy  and/or health people succumb to the damage the virus causes, as well as the first responders and frontline health workers become infected, some passing away, but everyday fighting to save other people’s lives, in circumstances most of us could’ve NEVER seen coming unless one is Bill Gates or was the genius that was Dr. Stephen Hawking.

We’ve seen people licking toilets or coughing in public saying they have COVID-19 whether they do or not.

We’ve seen people who know they have COVID-19 or suspect it and  not warn others, not social distance for what would be reasonable reason normally, such as having a loved one in the hospital and wanting to be there for them or unreasonable and unconscionable reasons to spread the virus.

Law Enforcement has seen an increase in domestic violence calls.

You have people who can’t seek acute care either without risk or even in epicenter like NYC now (and for some time) patients dying in unprecedented circumstances and their loved ones and medical professionals responses and their own suffering and knowing that here in the U.S., the feeling of being in crisis will have it’s effect on people.

I’ve been very blessed that everyone I love the most so far, is okay.

And today was supposed to be for my own mental health, a day where I took a break from watching the news but even the little I’m online or offline, as I got out today which is rare but was needed as I had prescriptions and food to get, there’s a reminder everywhere of the challenges COVID-19 has presented.

As others have said, we can’t just look for the helpers, like Mr. Rogers was famous for comforting us, we have to be the helpers.

And if one can’t help, at least be careful as they are capable of, to not to do any further harm to one another.

I can’t stress how important though it can help, that if you can just positively help someone is that you do so when you can.

Sometimes doing that is just reminding one another that we care and you see many initiatives online and off, that is doing this.

Sometimes, though it’s more sad and scary, but necessary to say at times, that people have to be just as vigilant about their mental fitness and agility, as some are with their physical health and fitness and realize some aren’t in control of either and/or the risks they present to others and be prepared for that and the unexpected in people and in patients that may have been physically and mentally fit in the past.

As sometimes medical crisis can cause mental health ones and I would know about that, almost better than anyone, unfortunately.

As much as we can try to convey and we can’t stop, that we’re in this together, there are so many factors here that will provide mental health challenges and crisis, that while may not rival  the medical crisis we’re in, that we still have to personally and as a community, professional or not, have to actively and constructively prepare for, both in ourselves and with others and we’re going to have to do this in a manner that’s  consistently, comprehensively and with patient vigiliance going forward as we all adjust and evolve because of the devastation and challenge that COVID-19 has now presented to everyone globally.

Kindness and patience with ourselves and with one another, while has always been important, is going to be of utmost importance, as we try hard to move forward.

The next pandemic will be in mental health

While I didn’t think I was the only one worrying what is said on this blog that I’m linking, I have been wracking my brain for the last 3 days, feeling an urgent need to see something like this or a need to write something similar and then gratefully the blog linked up above, that came in Kevin M.D email tonight.

I’m so grateful that my non clinically trained cognitively disabled self didn’t have to address this, as while I’m good at providing comfort, I suck at being calm or concise.

I am so grateful for Dr. Hamdani for writing this wonderfully insightful and helpful blog.

And you will be grateful too, if you choose to read it, whether topic is and/or was on your mind.

Even if it wasn’t…




I get that for a multitude of reasons, people need to get outside or in their homes let off some steam.

Just please keep in mind that different neighbors may be taking a 5 p.m nap on a Thursday or a 10 a.m one on a Sunday,  because they work in a job that isn’t set to a traditional schedule in time or day of the week.

Please realize that most people do not want to hear loud nuisance noise for extended period of times and try to do better.

If one is feloniously stupid and/or thoughtless enough to think they should be able to do what they want, when they want like all the time,  when they live in any kind of community, well I’ll still wish you well.

As well as hope that they’ll come to realize one day that they don’t want to want to be without common consideration, any longer, either.

Peace… like literally!!!


This blog is with the intent to provide some kind of showing of care, concern and comfort for those who are suffering or feeling some level of grief stricken in time of global loss of life and sudden major change of life circumstances that are filled with uncertainty.

I’ve found while above song that I’m linking is perfect as it is, in the chorus “bring them all back to life”, I’ve added in my head “please don’t let them die” and “please let them all stay alive”, help me identify the sense of empathy I have for those who are suffering, and a desire to show caring, even though there’s so next to nothing I can do, other than that and identify how demoralizing it can feel so powerless.

As well give safe space  for  humans to help stay united, in our joined humanity and caring for others, that just putting out there that others have concern and compassion, can hopefully help someone who needs gentle reminding in time of suffering, that others care enormously about them and their loved ones and their losses.

Anyways I’m so sorry for those who are suffering for so many different reasons and I’m so  terribly sorry for your loss.

3345e3c9eefa83157decb4c65c679ea3 (crisis global mental health)

(note: I’ve found above channel that produced above video, to have a library of instructional videos for important life saving techniques, there are others though that if you want to share in comments, feel free, thanks).

Important Disclaimers: Nothing I say should replace clinically trained professional medical and/or mental health, emergency first response or public safety as I have NO training.

However, I do believe that almost everyone can and should learn emergency first aid.

Especially in a time where resources are being taxed and we are all feeling vulnerable, if you have internet access and free time, there are free resources that teach important life saving techniques until help arrives that buys precious time for loved ones or one’s self (i.e. such as recognizes signs of CVA/Stroke in self or other).

I couldn’t find recommendations as far as performing first aid in public during COVID-19, as while technique for hands free CPR has been around regarding other communicable diseases but may not protect a good samaritan who touches anyone with a lot of first aid techniques in the COVID-19 era.

And  first aid protocols recommend NOT putting oneself in danger, so it might help to evaluate before a crisis of being okay just calling 911 (or emergency services in your country), should a stranger need lifesaving first aid while COVID-19 is still such a threat.

For those who have disabilities like I do with long and short term memory loss, I revisit trusted first aid sites online for free at least 2x a year, and/or for those limited income but prior to becoming disabled, I was certified in Infant, Child and Adult CPR and first aid sometimes getting a discount on courses from American Red Cross most of my adult life, as it gave me peace of mind as a parent and then later it was necessary for professional reasons before disabilities hit, so that’s why I don’t get certified any longer.

Also something important to think about but not dwell too much on as far as citizen first aid response to a stranger.

In my case, where I already have a DNR/DNI AHD, knowing my strengths and weaknesses, in my case I’d probably assume the risk as a non professional to do full CPR, try to stop a major bleed, et cetera, where there would be a health risk to myself.

Given my disability sets, though for example, can’t swim very good any longer,  breathe great, etc, so I would just call 911 and try to get someone else to help if someone is drowning in a large body of water, as I’d probably drown first before I could save someone and that wouldn’t help anyone.

I am honestly not trying to be preachy, just saying that in the digital era it helps alleviate some worry knowing that in some medical emergency you can save a life, whether it be oneself, a loved one or a stranger.

Important Note: Clinical constructive feedback and/or suggestions welcome, as well as resource recommendations.

Everyone-is-fighting-a-battle-you-know-nothing-abo (crisis resources globally)

Important Disclaimers: I am not a clinically trained medical or mental health provider or am I trained in matters of public safety.

If you or someone you know is in danger by circumstances, themselves or others, please contact emergency services and/or a medical or mental health professional, immediately.


The catalyst for this blog is due to the caveat I have as an activist who does activism not just for medical crisis but for mental health ones.

My normal disclaimer would be in addition to contacting emergency services, would be get to an acute care facility, if someone is in potential mortal danger.

We’re in a global pandemic though with COVID-19 that is taxing resources, in multiple ways and ways no one has quite seen before.

And as I tried to get across in my last blog, someone for many reasons and of many kinds, is in crisis and has been since humankind has been on Earth.

As someone who does activism for “fighting to stay alive” and that also means different things to different people for multiple reasons, as well.

For those though who deal with depression and other mental health issues that could be fatal to themselves or others, where it’s still so stigmatized, this is a gentle reminder not to be rushing or harsh with judgement.

The most read blog of mine, ever is a blog I wrote almost 2 years ago titled “How to help those who are suicidal when they don’t want anyone to know that they are”.

It’s not my only blog regarding suicide awareness, prevention and ideation but it’s read 5 times as much as any of my other blogs about suicide combined  on a global scale (half my readers aren’t just not in the U.S. but North America) and twice as much as my most read blog on gastric bypass reversals, which while I really don’t want to be known well online or offline, like at all or like ever,  is probably a more unique thing I blog about.

I wanted to wait before writing this, being a little more clearheaded, having my own personal issues to deal with but the hits to that above mentioned blog and other blogs about suicide are being read more since COVID-19 became a global pandemic.

The thing I learned with my complex disabilities, is that it’s not just I who cannot help everyone, or even myself at times.

Which everyone can relate to, at some time in their life for multiple reasons.

But to remind that there is help without shame or stigma in multiple forms for those who are fighting a battle with severe depression, and/or other adverse medical, mental, environmental or circumstances tangible or not, to themselves or others,  to stay alive that if you’re in mortal danger, you need to contact immediately appropriate support services.

It helps to remind oneself of that.

It helps to remind oneself of a good thing they are capable of, I know this from being aesthetically unpleasing to most humans, for so long and my unique disabilities, sometimes you can’t see the good but it’s identifiable, even though in some of us, it’s intangible.

It helps to take breaks from constant stressors and while it may take work for those who have a tendency and it’s hard to separate from distressing thoughts, especially in trying times, it’s possible and it helps.

In my case reading a book or magazine or watching a travel video or listening to my favorite music helps.

I hope you can find a positive distraction that will work for you and it may take acute professional help to get to that place.

I can only hope that like any other serious blogs I write about life and death situations find it’s way to those who need help but can’t see why they and their life is worth fighting for, which is hard to see in a crisis of many kinds and that those in need, get that help so that they can give live the best possible life, given their circumstances and what that looks like in us is different and sometimes more evolving that we can cope with at times and there is no shame in needing help to see that.

Just know help is out there, others can relate to the most unique and or bizarre circumstances and you aren’t alone and others do care.


Important Note: Any feedback that is not constructive will not be posted. Thanks!!!

Tag Cloud